Sometimes it is better to keep your mouth shut to avoid the problems that talking too much generates. Once you reveal too much, your language and your background will swiftly come to light and any information that you could have exposed will be definitely used against you. If you are curious enough you might see the patterns easily enough and deduct your options but by then there may be too much said and done. It is the end when the locomotive star you thought you were comes to a halt, stops dead in the tracks.
The Grand State of Disillusionment
In that state nothing you do makes any sense or brings any respite that you might be wanting to achieve. You are only aware of your limitations and sing praises to useless life in its basic shape and form, that reminds you of nothing. You seek sense in the nothing and all you get is a sneer of the reality. You wake up to that reality and it holds true and never goes away, as it lies dormant. No matter what move you could make at that moment you are deeply stuck and the more you believe to venture into another realm, the deeper you sink with the time losing color and texture. Each day is marked by the early morning noises from afar that nip in the bud your need to rise against the walls of your prison. The unruly shall be curbed, either by war or by a report from a lazy neighbor that picks their victims at random. No more words are necessary and here we shall pause […………]. The silence is no more valued as most of the utterances are useless anyway, and blabbering about meaningless things is that in itself meaningless babble. In the end you just want to keep shut forever, as the silence of great people is the symptom of grand suffering aka St Thomas. Speak no more in the human world, speak no more, perhaps write to people and expect nothing in return, no comments, nothing really. Perhaps sleep is where we all connect as we have no other choice, perhaps those who struggle in their sleep are trying to tell us something, like in that common subconsciousness. Perhaps the universal creature that we all are rests at the bottom of our mind and sends signals from there that are universally accepted or disregarded. The need for silence on my part continues and I wish this piece to be an exception to the rule, breaking the rules has always been a forte of many people.
You can only get as far as the society lets you, otherwise you become the clown that is passed on by in silent contempt, while we all are clowns in the street. Only the suffering is a redeeming value but there is nothing saintly in the sight of people hurting mightily, there is only pain. And that suffering does not occur in silence, only in broad daylight, only in the middle of the night, only where you cannot reach or touch. The fear of pain and the pain itself are those which should shake us to the core, awake us as we are going to feel pain sooner or later. No one is ever going to feel that pain we go through. But that does not matter as we bounce back and we discover we are so alone. More than ever.